John [00:00:00]: If I was a woman, I wouldn't tell my friend group shit about guy I was dating. I would not love.

Nicole [00:00:06]: Then what are you supposed to do? Just show up with a husband?

John [00:00:08]: Yes. Oh, it's just like Love is blind when those idiots start telling everyone about who they're dating. If I was on Love is Blind, I wouldn't tell anybody shit. You don't know. Is this girl gonna DM your guy?

Nicole [00:00:18]: So get rid of the girl. Yeah, but you wanna know if you have a girl like that in your circle so you can get rid of her.

John [00:00:23]: Yeah, but you might not know until she sabotaged your relationship.

Nicole [00:00:26]: Well, then that's not your man. If she could steal your man, that's not your man.

John [00:00:29]: Beyond the perfect we disc through our flaws we complete each other Better than perfect we stay through every fault we find our way. All right, welcome back to the Better than Perfect podcast, where every week we share with you how two imperfect people helping each other grow equals one better than perfect relationship.

Nicole [00:00:54]: That's right. And now I don't have anything in my teeth.

John [00:00:58]: You didn't have anything in your teeth. No one would know unless you said it now. Now they're gonna go back and watch the previous episode and zoom in on their.

Nicole [00:01:07]: Yeah, go watch the previous episode and look for the stuff in my teeth. Watch it like five times. Screenshot it, put it in the comments.

John [00:01:14]: And I'm not allowed to tell any jokes on this episode?

Nicole [00:01:16]: I didn't say that. I just said, let's keep it a little more serious than the last time.

John [00:01:24]: We'll try. We'll try. I'll do my best. What are we talking about today?

Nicole [00:01:31]: Friends Fluence. I think that's what they called it.

John [00:01:34]: Yeah.

Nicole [00:01:35]: Should friends influence your relationships? Your romantic relationships? I'm curious what you think, actually.

John [00:01:43]: Yeah, so I think absolutely not.

Nicole [00:01:45]: Never?

John [00:01:47]: Yes. 100% never. Not in the least way. I think you should completely. Whatever they say, you should ignore their advice. Just like you would ask them, what is your favorite pizza topping? And you would take just as much credence to that question. Cause it's your pizza. Like, okay, what does it matter what their favorite pizza topping is? Okay, but you're the one eating the pizza.

Nicole [00:02:11]: They're your friend.

John [00:02:12]: Yeah, but you're the one eating the pizza.

Nicole [00:02:13]: Yeah, but they know you as well, too.

John [00:02:16]: Yeah, but different.

Nicole [00:02:17]: You're not asking them, hey, should I date this person because you like them? That's not how this works.

John [00:02:24]: Yeah, but different floats for different boats. You know, like, I just made that up. But like, you know, like different people have different preferences and. Okay, so here's the biggest reason why. Okay, so first of all, people like different things, right?

Nicole [00:02:40]: Yeah.

John [00:02:41]: Second of all, everyone's biased, right? And they have their own biases, but their own motives and whatnot. So it's like, okay, let's say that you're dating someone who's really great and who's awesome and your friend's actually attracted to this person because they're so awesome,

Nicole [00:03:04]: so you think they're sabotaging.

John [00:03:07]: Then what are they giving you? An objective answer?

Nicole [00:03:09]: What kind of friends do you have subconsciously?

John [00:03:13]: They're not purposely doing this. Right? You see what I'm saying? It's like no matter what, there's going to be, it's not going to be a neutral party type of thing. You know what I'm saying? Plus, also, what are you sharing with them? You're giving them a narrated and edited story of this person. Unless they're directly observing your interactions with this person. But even then you're having public interactions. But they're not in there in the conversation, right? They're not in there in the bedroom. They're not, you know, like most likely you're venting to them and so they're hearing all the bad stuff.

Nicole [00:03:53]: But what if they're not?

John [00:03:55]: Then what? They're certainly not hearing a neutral perspective, an unbiased perspective. When you're talking to them about this person, you're either like infatuated with this person and they're giving you, you're giving them your infatuation story or you're annoyed with them and you're giving them the bad stuff. You're never giving them a true picture to judge from. And even if you gave them the perfect true picture to judge from, it could be just like this is the pizza topping they like. Maybe they like to have abusive relationship. And then who knows, whatever their flavor of relationship is, it might not be the same. It's not going to be the same.

Nicole [00:04:39]: I would like to bring something to evidence, but I'm not going to because it would not be very good.

John [00:04:48]: But wait a minute, hold on. You can't say that. What is the thing you would like to bring to evidence?

Nicole [00:04:55]: You had told me a long time ago that one of your friends said parents came to you and said some things and you didn't believe them and then you ended up down the road that you were dating.

John [00:05:08]: Okay, okay, hold on. Let's just address that real quick. So they didn't even meet my ex wife at all. They just literally was just like, he

Nicole [00:05:21]: must have heard from his son, though.

John [00:05:23]: I don't think so. I think he was just like, don't get married. I'll give you money to.

Nicole [00:05:27]: I mean, you were young, so that's probably why.

John [00:05:30]: Yeah, I think that's.

Nicole [00:05:31]: But also, it could have saved you from some heartbreaking situation.

John [00:05:37]: I mean. Okay, so. Okay, so you do bring up a decent point then, in the sense that, like, maybe someone can help you identify a red flag that you're blind to maybe. Right, but they can also make a

Nicole [00:05:50]: red flag out of nothing.

John [00:05:51]: Exactly.

Nicole [00:05:51]: I agree.

John [00:05:52]: So it would be better to just use your own judgment and have your own standards and decide things for yourself.

Nicole [00:06:00]: Okay, here's my take on this is. I think you should have conversations with your friends. I think with women it's different, but ultimately you make the decision because like you said, yes, people can make red flags out of nothing, but also people can point out red flags. And if you're really honest with yourself, you should be able to recognize, is this person making something out of nothing? Are they being too cautious? Or is this something that they're actually seeing that I don't see? Because I think there's value in both. And again, we kind of talked about this a little bit, like, right before we started recording this. But when you and I met, I showed my best friend a video that you had made me, and she was skeptical. And, you know, I listened to her and I understood where she was coming from.

John [00:06:57]: Right.

Nicole [00:06:58]: But I didn't follow through with cutting you off. And again, maybe. Well, she didn't even tell me to cut you off. Honestly. She was just like, I don't know, you know about this. Like, he is an influencer guy. Maybe he's just trying to get, you know, she was being cautious. And I appreciated that from my friend.

John [00:07:16]: Yeah.

Nicole [00:07:18]: But also, I knew that she's also my friend, so she is going to support the decision that I make at the same time. And I think that's the difference, too. Right. Like, yes, there might be some friends that have some bad ulterior motives, but that's a bad friend, honestly. And it's kind of better to learn that sooner rather than later. And I've had friends like that as well, too. I had a girl that was in my girl group of friends.

John [00:07:43]: Yeah.

Nicole [00:07:44]: And she sent me a screenshot of one of our other friends, guys that she was talking to. And she sent me a screenshot of her matching with the guy. And I was like, what kind of friend are you? Like, to Match with one of our other friends, person that they're talking to, and then send me evidence of it, like, to prove that, like, he also likes you. You know what I mean? I was like, that's like behavior that I think is a little too.

John [00:08:13]: They weren't dating, though. They're just.

Nicole [00:08:15]: No, but they had gone on quite a few dates.

John [00:08:18]: That's dating. More than one date is dating.

Nicole [00:08:22]: Okay, well, then they were dating, but they weren't official.

John [00:08:24]: That's fine.

Nicole [00:08:24]: But either way, I was like. I immediately sent it to the friend that was talking to the guy. And then I immediately told the friend who sent me the screenshot. I was like, that's not cool. I don't wanna be friends with someone like that. That is that sort of behavior that you're talking about. Like, that is someone that would sabotage your relationship because they want it or something. And again, this stuff can happen without you having to be like FBI agent to figure out if your friends are shiesty or not. Like, sometimes your friend's gonna blindside you with some stuff that you don't know. Yeah, but I think in the beginning I'm definitely would be talking to my friends about who I'm dating and whatever, but at the end of the day, I know me. And the thing is too, the same friend that told me, like, hey, he's an influencer. She knew from the second I sent her a picture of you that you were my type. And that's the difference. You're saying that people have different types. And I think maybe for men it's different because I think men will give you the advice of what they think is attractive versus my friend knew what I think is attractive, and it's not the same as what she thinks is attractive.

John [00:09:30]: True, true. I mean, yes, yes. But I think the fact still remains that. How could I put this? The advice that you're getting. Okay, so there's so many reasons why it's 90% bad and 10% good. There's so many reasons that way in that it's bad. There's so many ways I can come up with. So one of them is, is, okay, let's say that you're both single. Right. What does every person who has a friend know that happens when a single person gets into a relationship? Bye, bye, friend. Bye bye, friend. You're not going to be spending time with your friend anymore because they're in a relationship. Because as soon as people get together, then the friendship that they have with their single friend starts to diminish. So they don't really want you to be in a relationship subconsciously, you know what I'm saying? So there's so many things that can influence them that they're not even aware of that are influencing them, and there's no good. Okay, if you're sharing some stuff about who you're dating, fine. But if you're taking advice about who you're dating, that's bad. The chances of them giving you bad advice is way higher than them giving you good advice. And, and even if you don't ultimately listen to the advice, I mean, you should count it as if with zero credibility at all. Like 0%, 0%. Don't even regard it at all because it's so heavily weighted in being bad advice that it doesn't deserve any kind of play in your decision making. The only exception I would give is if it's like you're an idiot and your friends are not idiots and you have been proven to be an idiot in relationships and your friend has proven to not be an idiot in relationships, and they're acting more as a coach. They're coaching you and they're like, okay, you are infatuated with this guy that just got out of rehab and has been in prison five times and he's broke and you just like him because he's an asshole and he doesn't like you and you had a bad relationship with your father and you have no self respect for yourself, so that's why you're picking him. And I can see it because I know you as a friend and pick a different guy.

Nicole [00:12:07]: Yeah, that person's not even gonna take your advice.

John [00:12:10]: Exactly. So that's what I'm saying is it's like the only situation where it even makes sense if you already know you're an idiot and, and you don't know anything about dating and you have no judgment for yourself and your friends are a better judge and they're acting as a coach to you and you trust their judgment better than yours. Other than that, you need to trust your own judgment because it's not gonna be good. That's my.

Nicole [00:12:30]: I don't have any regrets on how I operated. I mean, I don't have to worry about this anymore. But I still stand by, though. In the beginning, granted. Now, if you're heavily influenced and you're not confident in your dating or in the person you're dating, it is a bad ide because of course, whatever anybody's gonna say is gonna influence you. But if you're solid in your dating experience, I don't think it really matters as, like, I'm not saying it can't still bite you in the ass. Like, you could still listen to what your friend said and know that your friend has good intentions, but you could end up ruining it with somebody that you really like. But I think that if you're in tuned with what you want, right, and your experience with the person. Cause again, like you said, you can't explain everything to this person. You can't explain the stories. Just like, I mean, now my same friend that was like, watch out, you know, like, she wants nothing but good things for us. Like, she's very supportive. And even when she said that, I told her, you know, in that moment, I was like, no, I know that this is different. You know what I mean? And she accepted that.

John [00:13:38]: Yeah.

Nicole [00:13:38]: So the thing is that your friend should also hear you out and support you as well too. I think that, like, I wouldn't ask just random friends. It would be people really close to me, people that, like, knew me. People knew that my experience. And again, even if I came to them, right, I would still trust that. I know myself better than they do, and I know the experience better than they do, but I would still want to hear them out because again, what if they did point out something that maybe I had overlooked? Or what if they were like, you know, watch out for this, or I saw him post with his girlfriend like two days ago.

John [00:14:22]: Okay, well, that's different.

Nicole [00:14:23]: Because women are gonna be like, AI, not AI FBI agents. And we're like, that's different.

John [00:14:30]: That's not asking for advice. That's not having a friend vet your relationship. That's having them sleuth, which is different. That's fine. I agree. Let women sleuth for each other. That's fine.

Nicole [00:14:43]: Do men sleuth? Men should sleuth. What are you gonna sleuth about 20, 26. Men should sleuth.

John [00:14:51]: It's just like, okay, think of it this way also, right? Here's another argument. It's like, okay, imagine that I had a friend that you did have a

Nicole [00:15:00]: friend that said, you shouldn't go out with me. You should go out with the girl that he looked like he liked.

John [00:15:06]: But that's a different thing than some attribute of you, you know what I'm saying? Dating you and then him being like, yeah, I don't think she's the right fit for you. Imagine if I had a friend right now that had told me, I don't think she's the right girl for you. I don't Think you should marry her? That person would have.

Nicole [00:15:24]: Nobody told you that.

John [00:15:25]: No one told me that.

Nicole [00:15:27]: That's a good thing.

John [00:15:28]: Yeah, but imagine if I had that friend now. I don't think I would have that friend now. Right. Like, that friendship could not survive the marriage.

Nicole [00:15:37]: That's true.

John [00:15:38]: Right, because you would never want to ever be me hanging around with that guy. Because what if he still thinks that? What if he slips that in? What if he subconsciously influences me or influences me in that direction? You sabotage the relationship. So it goes both ways. So, number one, I will never give a friend advice about a relationship. Like, whether that, like, vet a person, because I know that that is the end of the friendship if that relationship continues and I gave them negative advice because that. I know. I'm. I've just. In fact, we know someone who did this, and they got excommunicado out of. Out of a friendship because they did this because they opened their mouth against the person. And then, number two, I would never take the advice because I don't also. I don't want to even listen. I'm not even gonna ask a friend in order for them to put their foot in their mouth and then become excommunicado.

Nicole [00:16:32]: Well, okay, here's the thing is, like, I agree that if someone's like, I don't think that's the woman for you, because that should be later on in the relationship. I think that even if they said it, like, three dates, in which was the situation, like, with the video thing.

John [00:16:49]: Yeah.

Nicole [00:16:51]: That to me, is not the same as later on. They had been like, oh, I don't think that you belong with him, or whatever. Like, that's totally different. Like, if you're gonna be a bold enough friend to say, I don't think that's the person for you, or you shouldn't be with them. Yeah, you better come with some receipts of, like, they're abusing you in some way that you don't realize. They're. I don't know, they're doing some. They got some secret life stuff going on that I've uncovered through the FBI. Like, you better come with something like that if you're throwing out things like that.

John [00:17:27]: Or just stay out of it. Or just stay out of it, which is possible. Like, if someone asks me, I'll tell you what, you want relationship coaching? I'll help you with your relationship. I'll coach you on your relationship. You want me to vet a person? Hell to the nah. I am not touching that shit. I'm not touching it.

Nicole [00:17:44]: Are less likely to do this than women are. Cause I think women would be more like, do you think this is a good guy? Like, they're more willing to ask their friends those things.

John [00:17:55]: Yeah. I would still not touch it. I would suggest to not touch it.

Nicole [00:17:59]: I mean, that is the safer option. But it's also like, as a woman, you want to help your friend as well, too. And I'm not saying that you should be like, he sucks. Some guys do suck. I'm not gonna sit here and say that I haven't told one of my friends who was dating a really crappy guy, like, treating her very poorly. And she was going above and beyond for this guy who was treating her poorly that she shouldn't be with him.

John [00:18:27]: But was she an idiot?

Nicole [00:18:29]: She stayed with him for a while. She's not with him anymore.

John [00:18:31]: But was she an idiot at that time?

Nicole [00:18:34]: I guess so.

John [00:18:35]: Okay. And so that falls into the, like, coaching an idiot.

Nicole [00:18:38]: You're still supposed to love your friend, even if they're doing something that's not the smartest thing. But, like, she knew, though, that she would come to me about these problems and I'd be like, look, like, this isn't. This doesn't seem like a guy that's really treating you well.

John [00:18:55]: Yeah.

Nicole [00:18:56]: And then she'd still choose to stay with him. So then she became afraid to tell me things.

John [00:19:01]: Right.

Nicole [00:19:02]: But then when she really wanted advice, she would be like, actually tell me. I don't care what you have to say.

John [00:19:07]: Like, just say you're making the opposite of your case. But.

Nicole [00:19:09]: But, no, but I think that that's because you should still be honest with your friends. They didn't get married, and that was only because he was treating her really poorly.

John [00:19:23]: Yeah. Yeah. Which I get. Which is fine. That's like, if someone's being treated really poorly in the relationship to give your friend that advice. But then the advice becomes more like, these are the standards you need to have for yourself. Like, you shouldn't allow yourself to be treated this way, as opposed to, this guy's not the guy for you.

Nicole [00:19:45]: That's true.

John [00:19:46]: You know what I'm saying? It's better to approach it. It's more of, like, therapy, coaching advice, relationship advice, versus. Because the other thing is. Which.

Nicole [00:19:54]: That's a good way to phrase it. Maybe that women do need to focus more on that. Focus more on helping your friend with their standards rather than about the person.

John [00:20:04]: But that's why vetting is kind of what we asked. That's why I'm saying I'm against the vetting. I'm not against the coaching. I'm not against the helping people with the relationship, obviously, but the vetting, relying on other people to vet.

Nicole [00:20:16]: Like you said, it's hard to vet because if one of our friends came to us and was like, tell us if this guy is good or if this girl is good, we would have to bring them on the podcast or something and be like, ask them all these questions. Because we are only gonna get the information from our friend. And what if it's not the full picture? Cause what if they don't even know the full picture yet? Cause they've only been on a few dates.

John [00:20:41]: Yeah.

Nicole [00:20:42]: So I agree with you that being like, is this a good person? Is this not a good person? Is hard. Unless the person, again, is doing really messed up things or abusing somebody or just not treating the person really well, then that's different. But it's really hard to be like, yes, this is a good person or not. I think that a better way that works for a lot more people is not having their friends vet the person, but meeting a partner through a friend group. Because that way the friends already know each other and then you know the person. And so it's like, you don't have to explicitly say, like, I vouch for this person.

John [00:21:27]: Yeah, but they might have a secret crush on the person. Like if it's in a friend group or they have some kind of relationship because it's a. Let me give you a better one.

Nicole [00:21:35]: Okay?

John [00:21:36]: Instead of having your friends vet. Right. Introduce your person you're dating to your friends and observe. Observe the interactions yourself.

Nicole [00:21:49]: But what if you can't?

John [00:21:51]: Then, no, that's what I'm saying. You want to see, how does this person that you're dating interact with your friends? Is he flirting with your friends? Is he combative with your friends? Is he dismissive? You're learning a lot more about the person by seeing how they interact with your friends rather than your friend's opinion of the person.

Nicole [00:22:12]: That's true, but what if some of your friends don't live nearby? That's where they're friends. Huh?

John [00:22:17]: Then why does it matter what their opinion is? That's what I'm saying. It's like it's better to not take their opinion.

Nicole [00:22:23]: I mean, I agree. At the end of the day, your opinion on the person is the only one that matters. But I also think that, I don't know, from a girl perspective, I don't think it's horrible unless you're just believing whatever Your friend says, okay, let me

John [00:22:41]: give you one other reason. So in software development, we have this thing, this thing called scrum, right? Okay. This is like a way of running software development projects, okay? And one of the things that in the.

Nicole [00:22:52]: Why is it called scrum?

John [00:22:54]: It comes from rugby. They have like a scrum meeting where they huddle together. It's called a scrum. So one of the things is you have. And I'm going to butcher this badly because it's been a long time, but there has to be. So there's different roles in the scrum, right? And you've got essentially a product owner who owns the product. You've got a scrum master who oversees the thing, and then you've got the developers or testers who are doing the work, and you've got the stakeholders in the project. And so the whole idea is that the product owner who owns the product is one of the stakeholders, so they actually are involved in the project. And the reason for this, the analogy that they use, is that, okay, so when you're making breakfast, right, and maybe I could just use this analogy by itself. It probably doesn't have to be really disgruntled, but, okay, when you're making breakfast, right, you've got the chicken that lays the eggs, right? You got the pig. That is the bacon. Is the bacon, right? And so who do you trust, right? Because who has their ass on the line? The pig. The pig has contributed more than the chicken. The chicken has no stake. It just laid the eggs. The pig has his ass on the line because the pig actually contributes the bait. You get what I'm saying?

Nicole [00:24:28]: Literally his ass.

John [00:24:29]: It's literally his ass, right?

Nicole [00:24:30]: Yes.

John [00:24:30]: So I got a very long way of getting there. But basically, what I'm trying to say, because it's been a while since I've.

Nicole [00:24:39]: Is your ass is on the line, so your opinion's the only one that matters.

John [00:24:42]: Exactly. So they're just chickens. Your friends are just chickens. They're just peck, peck, peck, whatever. They have no stake in this. They don't get to suffer the consequences or the benefits they have. So their opinion. So the only opinions that I care about is people who have their ass on the line. So if I'm doing business advice, right, if someone's giving me business advice, they can fuck off. Because unless they're an investor in the business or they're actually in the business, their opinion means fuck all to me. I don't care what their opinion is, because they have no stake in it. So if I fail or don't fail, it doesn't matter to them because they didn't lose any money. They don't gain any money. But if they put money in it, now I'm listening to them. And so with relationships, that's how I look at it.

Nicole [00:25:32]: Unless you become a love triangle, then their opinion matters.

John [00:25:35]: If they have some kind of stake in it, then their opinion, because they

Nicole [00:25:39]: can give you whatever. Like their stake in it is you, their friend, who they really care about.

John [00:25:44]: Yeah. But in reality, they don't really suffer the consequences. If you break up with this person, get your heart broken, whatever they're there for you, get molested, whatever, it's not there.

Nicole [00:25:53]: Why are you going there?

John [00:25:55]: I'm saying, like, if you're dating a creepo or something like that and you get right.

Nicole [00:25:58]: Your friends are trying to keep you

John [00:25:59]: from dating a creepo.

Nicole [00:26:01]: They're trying to keep you from dating a creepy yo.

John [00:26:02]: But they don't have no stake in it. They might give you bad advice and say, oh, this guy looks good when he doesn't look good. Because they haven't had to think about it to the depth. Because there's no stake for them. There's no consequences or benefit for them. And so you should never listen to people who have no stake in the outcome of a situation.

Nicole [00:26:21]: I hear what you're saying. I still stand by mine because I think you can hear what your friends have to say.

John [00:26:27]: Sure.

Nicole [00:26:28]: And then still make your own decision.

John [00:26:30]: I agree with that for sure.

Nicole [00:26:33]: So I don't see the harm in whatever my friend has to say. Again, like you said, now if I'm like, you and I are together officially for a long time, and they're like, I don't think that's the person for you. That's a. You know what I mean? I'm not saying that that's not the case, but if I'm dating people and my friend's like, I don't know, I have a weird feeling about that guy. If I want to go on a date with him still, I'm going to. But also at the same time, I might be like, okay, well, let me keep an eye out and see what's going on. I am interested in this guy, but I am maybe going to be a little bit. Pay a little bit closer attention. I don't think that's a bad thing.

John [00:27:08]: It could influence you, but in a bad way.

Nicole [00:27:10]: It could. But at the same time, again, I know what I want. Having, like, been in the position that I was in when I was dating, I Was confident in my decisions right now. If you're somebody that's just gonna go by whatever your friends have to say, then, yeah, it's better to not ask them or not get involved.

John [00:27:28]: Yeah. I mean, look, I would ask or not even ask, but just.

Nicole [00:27:33]: You would. You asked your friend who you should go out with.

John [00:27:37]: That was. Okay. I asked as a, like, as a. In fact, that's a good example, right. I sent four pictures of girls, right. Of which you were clearly the hottest. Right? And it was sort of like a joke, like, oh, which one of these four should I pick? Where? I'm like, oh, of course he's going to pick the hottest one. And then he's like, no, he doesn't. He picks a blonde girl. Right? And so that's a perfect example of why it's a bad idea.

Nicole [00:28:05]: But you didn't listen to him. You knew you weren't gonna listen to him.

John [00:28:07]: Of course I'm not gonna.

Nicole [00:28:07]: You knew who you were gonna pick. I'm me. You still chose to ask him, though. Cause he's your friend.

John [00:28:12]: No, no, I didn't ask him because he's my friend. I asked him as.

Nicole [00:28:15]: To rub it in his face.

John [00:28:16]: Yes, exactly. Exactly. To rub it in his face. Like, look at how hot this girl is. Right. However, that just kind of proves the point is because I would entertain just like, okay, if I watched a movie already and ask someone, did you watch the movie? And like, oh, what did you think of it? Sure, I already watched the movie. I already got my opinion of the movie. I'm just curious what you thought of it. For curiosity's sake. I don't give a fuck all about what your actual opinion of it is. It doesn't influence my opinion of it at all. Right. If I haven't watched the movie, that's where it's dangerous. Okay? Now, the thing is, like, if I ask some friends, I'm like, oh, yeah, I'm dating this girl. What do you think? Or I say something about the girl. Like, hearing their opinion of it is literally just like comments on the Internet. It's just hearing their. It has no bias, no basis for influencing me at all. I mean, obviously it will influence. But what I'm saying is that I take no regard to it at all. It's just like. It's just a commentary. It's not advice. Right. That's how I would view it. It's like, yeah, just out of curiosity, what does this person think? Just like you would ask them, what is your favorite pizza topping? It was like, oh, well, I like pepperoni. Oh, shit. I guess I better like pepperoni. Then. I was like, this is not pepperoni pizza. So I don't know what to do anymore. Like, you see what I'm saying? It's like you would ask someone just

Nicole [00:29:36]: out of curiosity for yourself. They would ask you.

John [00:29:38]: Someone out of curiosity, but not out of anything else is what I would say.

Nicole [00:29:41]: But also, if your friend knew you and you sent those pictures, then they probably would have been like, oh, you should go for this girl. You know what I mean? That's like, some of my friends, I know who they dated, so if they sent me pictures, I'd be like, well, this guy looks like someone you've dated before. If you want to go for the same sort of people because you're attracted to that, or try any of the other ones for something different, that sounds

John [00:30:06]: like completely useless advice.

Nicole [00:30:11]: But it's helping them make a decision.

John [00:30:13]: Captain Obvious comes in and saves the day.

Nicole [00:30:15]: Helping them make a decision.

John [00:30:16]: It doesn't really. It's just Captain Obvious.

Nicole [00:30:18]: It helps them make their own decision.

John [00:30:20]: Uh, I mean, I don't know. Like, I feel like it. It's. It's like.

Nicole [00:30:25]: I think it's different for guys, though. Guys aren't doing this stuff. Like.

John [00:30:28]: But women like women. Women, like, screw themselves over because. Especially because women also are more in general. Okay, I'm making a generalization about women, that they're more catty and competitive within their own. Like, okay, dude is like, okay, let me just give you the club scene, right? And you'll understand what I'm saying. Going to the club, right? Picking up a girl, right? I'm with my friend. Guy friends, right? It's like, let's say that we're roommates.

Nicole [00:30:59]: The guy.

John [00:31:01]: The guy. The guys. Like, a couple guys. We're roommates, right? I pick up a girl, I'm like, I'm, like, gonna bring her back to my place.

Nicole [00:31:12]: He's gonna a monk you.

John [00:31:14]: No, the other guys are like, dude, we'll go sleep in the car. Like, they're like, yes, they are. Yes, they are. I swear. Ask Rodrigo. No, other dudes are like, yeah, we'll sleep in the car, dude. Like, yeah, yeah. Like, we'll get out of your way. Like, we'll sleep in the car. Like, get the girl, right? Girl talking to a guy with her girlfriends. They're doing everything. Cockblock. They're, like, jealous because she's got a girl, she's got a guy, and the guy's interested in them, not interested in them. Like, oh, they're like, oh, but you're supposed to be with us. Don't spend all this time with this guy. The guys are like, everything to support this guy and his mission to go get laid tonight. The girls are everything to prevent the girl from breaking with the pack and getting the guy.

Nicole [00:32:01]: You want to know why?

John [00:32:02]: For safety, whatever. But regardless. Also because of jealousy. Also because of all these things that are going on.

Nicole [00:32:09]: You can't trust probably 10%. What you're saying, jealousy, 10%. Because I have been left by my group of girlfriends all by myself, pissed at them cause they left with some random guy and left me all by myself with no way to get home. Like when we all plan to go together and all leave together. I get that it's not always about a jealousy thing.

John [00:32:34]: It's not always. It's not always.

Nicole [00:32:35]: And then I've also probably been the asshole girl too, to be like, I'm gonna go with this person. You know what I mean? Like, as a woman, it's not as easy. As a guy. Yeah. You could be like, let's go. Because you don't have to worry about dying. Also, your friends are trying to figure out if this guy who's trying to get you back to his hotel is gonna murder you.

John [00:32:51]: I get there's.

Nicole [00:32:51]: Because you barely know him and they barely know him.

John [00:32:54]: And I get that. But there's also the jealousy, the rivalry, the women breaking the pact. What I'm saying is that in general, women are more like, have secret motives. Secret motives. Guys don't have as much secret motive. I'm not saying that you can't ever. But what I'm saying is that you can't really trust that there's not some kind of other.

Nicole [00:33:21]: I think your example is a poor example because there's a lot. It's a poor example involved in that. And there's a lot at risk for a going out club situation and letting your friend leave with a random man.

John [00:33:34]: Sure.

Nicole [00:33:34]: Like, it's a lot different. And it's a lot different for the girl that's leaving with a stranger. And it's a lot different for the friends that let her leave with a stranger. And then they feel like that's on them because they let her friend do that.

John [00:33:46]: You're right.

Nicole [00:33:47]: That's not a good example.

John [00:33:48]: Okay, it's not a good example. Fair. I'll give you that. True or false. Girls are more likely to sabotage each other.

Nicole [00:34:01]: I feel like in my almost 35 years as a woman, I only felt like one person I knew Was like that.

John [00:34:11]: That you knew.

Nicole [00:34:12]: That I knew.

John [00:34:13]: But in general.

Nicole [00:34:15]: But see, I'm thinking of my experience as one person, and then I'm thinking about the stories that you've told where guys will amog you. So, like, how is that not the same?

John [00:34:25]: Because they're not your bros. Random. Okay, here's the thing. Men are tribal, okay? If you have my. If I have my bros, right? We'll do anything for each other, okay? But some random dude, he's the enemy. We will compete against that guy. Destroy that guy. He's outside of the group. He is the enemy. Right? He is completely the enemy just by

Nicole [00:34:50]: being sometimes take other bros. Sure.

John [00:34:52]: You take it. No, no, no. I mean, that's. You're definitely out of the bro. Like, that's completely.

Nicole [00:34:58]: You're done.

John [00:34:59]: You're a bro. You're out of the tribe. You're examining the kado from the tribe for sure. If you do that shit, like, that's not cool.

Nicole [00:35:05]: Girl code.

John [00:35:05]: Yeah, exactly.

Nicole [00:35:06]: Well, girls have girl code too. So she gets kicked out if she steals your man.

John [00:35:11]: Yeah, but it's more like, okay, think about all of the friendships that you've had and lost and since the time that I've known you and how sort of like, how sort of catty kind of shit caused those dissolutions, right? How many friendships have you seen me lose since we've known each other? Zero. Okay. How many?

Nicole [00:35:38]: I've helped you gain friendships. Yeah, you help me.

John [00:35:40]: Okay. How many? Because. But women definitely, like, there's.

Nicole [00:35:43]: But we have a lot of friendships.

John [00:35:44]: There's a more inner competition. Okay? So men, when they're together in a group, if men are in my tribe, we are collaborative, right? Like, we are going to help each other, right? To the outside men. Fuck those guys. Those guys. We're gonna fuck those guys over. Fuck those guys. Right? Don't even care. Okay? To women, it's the opposite. Not exact opposite, but to women in their group, super competitive within the group, super competitive. That's where the cattiness. That's where the competition comes from within the group, right? And that's why, like, I don't like that. But you're not like that. But women in general are like that. They're super competitive within the.

Nicole [00:36:23]: No, I said I don't like that.

John [00:36:25]: I know you don't.

Nicole [00:36:26]: I try not to be a part of that, but it happens. And I have lost people that want me to be a part of it, but I don't want to.

John [00:36:31]: But you see it happen, right? And that's why? Like, women should not be trusting their friends because you're in a competitive group where it's like, if you're hot, then your friends can't be hot. Like, that's how they're. You know what I'm saying? It's like. Like your win is their loss. Right. That's more how women in groups think.

Nicole [00:36:47]: That's insecure women.

John [00:36:49]: But in general, women in groups think more like that and men don't. And so it's dangerous. So, like, if I was a woman, I'm not a woman. If I was a woman, I wouldn't tell my friend group shit about guy I was dating. I would not at all tell them.

Nicole [00:37:07]: Then what are you supposed to do? Just show up with a husband?

John [00:37:09]: Yes. Do not give them any kind of intel. It's just like, what's the. Oh, it's just like Love is Blind when those idiots start telling everyone about who they're dating. If I was on Love is Blind, I wouldn't tell anybody shit. I wouldn't tell them anything about them.

Nicole [00:37:24]: But the guys do it too.

John [00:37:25]: Yeah, they're idiots too, but I wouldn't because they're not a tribe. Those are competitive guys that are competing with you because you're not a tribe. I wouldn't tell anybody shit because I don't want anybody fucking with my shit. And sustain. That's how I would do it as a woman. I wouldn't tell anybody shit. Cause you don't know. Is this girl gonna DM your guy?

Nicole [00:37:44]: You get rid of the girl. You wanna know if you have a girl like that in your circle so you can get rid of her.

John [00:37:49]: Yeah, but you might not know until she sabotaged your relationship.

Nicole [00:37:52]: Well, then that's not your man. If she could steal your man, that's not your man.

John [00:37:55]: But she might still be in there, you know what I mean? Causing chaos.

Nicole [00:37:58]: Yeah. Then your friends should show you, be

John [00:38:00]: like, are spreading rumors about you and some shit like that.

Nicole [00:38:05]: Because I wanna know that so I can kick him out. I wanna.

John [00:38:08]: Like, it could be just someone you're going on a couple dates with yet at this point. Like, they're not your man yet, so it's not even.

Nicole [00:38:13]: But even then, if you steal my man, then he was never my man.

John [00:38:17]: Yeah, I just think it's like, unless someone is a pig, they got their ass on the line, they're providing the bacon for the breakfast, they ain't got no business.

Nicole [00:38:28]: Look, I've already said my thing. The thing is, I hear what you're saying, but I Would want to know rather than not know. I'd rather get rid of a friend like that than keep them around and they're low key like that for who knows how long. Get out of here. I get springing the trap, but I still believe. And how I operated was. I talked to my friends, sure. And I made my own decisions.

John [00:38:53]: Yeah, but did it ever actually benefit you see? Yeah, not ultimately. In the end, it didn't benefit you. The only advice that you got was what turned out to be incorrect advice, which was what was me. Right. But you didn't marry any of those other guys.

Nicole [00:39:12]: They didn't tell me that they were my husband. They're not telling me, pick this guy or don't pick this guy. But I'm just saying they're just giving me their opinion.

John [00:39:18]: Yeah. So their opinion ended up being worth jack Nothing Right. At the end of the day. But it could have hurt. It could have hurt you.

Nicole [00:39:27]: Here's the thing that you don't understand.

John [00:39:28]: It couldn't help you, but it could have hurt you.

Nicole [00:39:30]: The thing is that you don't understand is that this is just what women talk about.

John [00:39:35]: I got it.

Nicole [00:39:35]: I did not go there and be like, what do you think of this guy? I was talking about my experience, showed the video, and then she gave her opinion. It was not, should I be with this guy? Should I not be with this guy?

John [00:39:49]: I got it.

Nicole [00:39:50]: I'm not asking anybody that's a question. And I agree. You shouldn't ask that. You shouldn't ask your friend, should I be with this person or not? But I don't see anything wrong with talking about your experience. Because also, like, what if I was talking to somebody and they were like, oh, like, I heard that that guy's married? I would have appreciated that information because you weren't giving it to me. But you know what I mean? Like, this is why women talk. Because you don't know what's gonna come out.

John [00:40:17]: Yeah, but not vet. Vetting is what we talked about on the. You know what I mean? Like, you can talk about it, but disregard the opinions. If they bring you talk about it. If they bring you. If they bring you facts. If they're like, okay, this guy is married, or like, this guy messaged me on Facebook or whatever, that's a fact. That's not an opinion.

Nicole [00:40:35]: Right.

John [00:40:36]: But when I say I'm all for facts, you give me a fact. If I talk to a guy friend of mine and he's like, yeah, I subscribe to her onlyfans, I'll be Oh, thank you for giving me that fact.

Nicole [00:40:45]: Right, exactly that fact.

John [00:40:46]: I will use that fact.

Nicole [00:40:48]: But see, this is what I'm saying is that like, I wouldn't call that vetting. You wouldn't call that vetting, but that's what women do and I don't see anything wrong with that.

John [00:40:56]: I would call that the discovery process,

Nicole [00:40:59]: whatever you want to call it. I already told you that vetting being like yes or no to somebody with your friends picking for you is not a good thing. But talking about it and hearing their opinion, I don't think there's anything wrong with that. But you have to stand on that. You know what you want and you are going to make the decision. Decisionman. The decision ultimately is going to be yours.

John [00:41:25]: Yeah.

Nicole [00:41:26]: So like, you're not just gonna follow what your friend says or what they think about this guy. You know the guy better than anybody, you're going on the dates with him.

John [00:41:35]: Right, right.

Nicole [00:41:37]: So vetting as in should you be with this person or not? No, but talking to your friends, having open dialogue, hearing their opinion, I don't see anything wrong with that personally. But you have to know that you're not whether you're gonna be influenced because you just wanna be like, oh, I want this friend's approval or whatever.

John [00:41:58]: You will be influenced. How much you'll be influenced, it depends on how you come into it.

Nicole [00:42:05]: That's fine. And I think it's different as a woman. You want all perspectives because it's more dangerous for you as a woman to date. It's not the same for guys. It's totally what guys worry about, dating. Is this girl gonna like me or not for sure, or is she gonna bang me or not? What girls worry about with dating is like, is he a low key serial killer? Is he acting really nice but then he's gonna be an asshole? Is he like, have a secret life that I don't know about? Like, there's so much more. So you do wanna know the opinion,

John [00:42:35]: but which is more likely a false flag of this guy is now marked as a serial killer or a true flag.

Nicole [00:42:41]: Look, if your friend's like, you don't really know this guy, you should be careful. Okay, that's good advice.

John [00:42:46]: That's good advice.

Nicole [00:42:47]: That's not gonna say he's a serial killer.

John [00:42:49]: That's not vetting though.

Nicole [00:42:50]: But that's what she's gonna say.

John [00:42:51]: That's good advice. That's not vetting. That's just advice for you. That's not advice about the guy, it's advice for you, right?

Nicole [00:42:57]: It's advice. Cause you don't know the guy.

John [00:42:58]: Advice for you is fine. Like, if you're like, oh, I'm dating this person. That's how most women. I'm struggling with this issue. Advice for you. Sure, that's fine.

Nicole [00:43:06]: That's what most women say. I think you're still upset about the influencers.

John [00:43:11]: We're talking about the vetting thing, though. But we're talking about vetting. That's what I'm saying. It's like. Because what do we say that the title was like, friend fluence. Yeah, Friend fluence. Okay. So, yeah. So, yeah. So should you let your friends influence or vet your relationship?

Nicole [00:43:24]: Right. It's all encompassing. We already talked about that. Vetting, deciding for you. No, but, like, hearing your friends out, I don't see a problem. You do.

John [00:43:38]: But just like, I don't. Like, just like, okay, I will hear what your favorite pizza topping is. Like, I will hear it. Sure. But it's like, it's as relevant to me as what, their favorite pizza.

Nicole [00:43:50]: Right. No one's saying you have to follow the friendfluence.

John [00:43:54]: Yeah, well, if it's.

Nicole [00:43:55]: But you can talk to your friends about it.

John [00:43:58]: You can talk to your friend. Yeah. You can share information with them, but you have to be careful what information you share with them.

Nicole [00:44:03]: Oh, of course. Like you said, you can't be, like, venting all these negative things and then expect your friends to be like, yeah, keep going out with him.

John [00:44:12]: Right.

Nicole [00:44:13]: Like, if you have valid concerns or if you're like, you know, he's not showing up till 3am every night.

John [00:44:22]: Sure. But yeah. Do you really need a friend to tell you that?

Nicole [00:44:25]: Some people do, I guess.

John [00:44:26]: Okay, then you do. Then in that case, that's the idiot versus the coach type of situation.

Nicole [00:44:31]: Which I guess, like you said, if you don't feel very confident in your dating abilities, then maybe you should find a friend. I think you should find a friend that's in a relationship.

John [00:44:39]: Yeah.

Nicole [00:44:40]: Because that's safer. I mean, when, in my defense, my friend that told me the thing about you, she was in a relationship. She wasn't trying to get me to be single.

John [00:44:48]: Yeah. Which is fine. But it's like, Yeah. I mean, I don't know. I don't really care about that so much. But as I'm thinking about now, it's like, okay, it could have influenced you negatively.

Nicole [00:45:00]: Yeah. But you kept things from me that also could have definitely influenced me negatively.

John [00:45:05]: For sure.

Nicole [00:45:06]: That's not good either.

John [00:45:08]: No. But you can't Be upset with my

Nicole [00:45:10]: friend with trying to protect me.

John [00:45:12]: I'm not upset with your friend. I'm not upset with your friend. I'm just saying from a judgment perspective, getting that advice could have harmed you. It could have been harmful. But not. Could have been helpful.

Nicole [00:45:25]: Could have been helpful as well.

John [00:45:28]: Facts, facts. So facts are helpful.

Nicole [00:45:32]: I think you're just upset.

John [00:45:33]: I'm not upset.

Nicole [00:45:34]: Well, no, I think you're upset because you had also things that you weren't telling me. So you can't really be upset with her decision when you had other things that were going on.

John [00:45:47]: You know what I mean? I'm not upset with their decision. It's just a matter of, like, should you. Should a person take advice from other people about. Yeah. At all? Like, and even if you're just. I think you should hear people out.

Nicole [00:46:00]: But. But ultimately it has to be your decision. So I agree with that. If you don't want anybody clouding your judgment, then don't talk about it. But I think just as women, we are gonna talk about it. So the best advice for women mostly is to make sure that you're making your own decision. And don't take every single person's opinion. Like, it's a fact. They know everything about your relationship. Ultimately you do. But also if your friends are like, hey, this is kind of alarming about something that maybe you're not seeing. Cause maybe you grew up in abusive or toxic environment or you're used to toxic relationships, I think that you should hear them out on those things. Ultimately, it's still gonna be your decision and your friends should support you no matter what. But if it's something like that, you should at least, like, give it some thought, in my opinion.

John [00:47:02]: Yeah, I guess I could see that part of it.

Nicole [00:47:07]: But you sound like. Yeah, you sound like there's a but.

John [00:47:10]: It's. I mean, just like, yeah, in an extreme case, perhaps, but they're not there. They don't know the relationship. They don't know the history. They don't know the, like, you know, everything.

Nicole [00:47:22]: And that's true.

John [00:47:23]: It depends if you're, like, talking about how, like, vetting or like, even in the relationship, like, advice.

Nicole [00:47:28]: That's true. But here's the thing with that, is that if your friends are pointing out, like, hey, this is looking a little toxic or whatever, and they don't know the full picture, imagine what could be happening in the full picture.

John [00:47:42]: Yeah.

Nicole [00:47:42]: You know what I mean?

John [00:47:43]: But it can also sound like toxic the way you're describing it versus what the actual Reality is. Right.

Nicole [00:47:51]: It's like, then I guess you would need to be like, look like, you know, this is coming across this way. I don't know if you're telling it a certain way or if this is what's actually happening, but this is how it's coming across.

John [00:48:02]: I guess that's maybe the other piece of it is. Again, why I'm so against it is the way that you're going to convey anything about a person is going to be biased also. So you're conveying something in a biased way to people who are going to receive it in a biased way and then give you biased advice. So by the time the message has gone back and forth, it's a worthless message almost 100% of the time. So share it. Because it's fun to gossip and talk about things and share what's going on in your life, but for no other reason than that is my. I'm sticking to that.

Nicole [00:48:37]: Yeah. I mean, I feel like I've already said how I feel.

John [00:48:41]: Yeah.

Nicole [00:48:42]: But I agree it can get messy. But I think you have to have your own opinion.

John [00:48:47]: Let me see if there's any things we didn't cover that was like, the core question is, are your friends protecting you from a bad relationship or sabotaging your ability to love someone?

Nicole [00:48:57]: I think for the most part, most friends are just trying to protect you, not trying to sabotage. Majority, majority.

John [00:49:03]: But are single friends usually the worst people to ask for relationship advice? This is kind of learned to like relationship advice things, but, yeah, dating advice.

Nicole [00:49:13]: Yeah. Ask your single friends. They're going on dates. Relationship. I mean, like. And even you can ask your relationship friends for dating advice since they did date.

John [00:49:21]: But relationship advice is fine if it's.

Nicole [00:49:25]: If they've been in one or just.

John [00:49:27]: I mean, just in general giving relationship advice. I'm not against that. I'm against like. But it's like more like, here's what you can do. Like, you should have more standards. You should set more boundaries versus, but here's my thought. Versus against the person.

Nicole [00:49:42]: When I was single, I would have loved to have a couple like you and I that I knew that I could ask relationship advice from.

John [00:49:51]: Yeah.

Nicole [00:49:51]: That's a good question. I would have preferred.

John [00:49:52]: That's a good thing. Yeah.

Nicole [00:49:54]: But I didn't have any relationship that I really thought was, like, really one I idolized.

John [00:50:01]: Yeah. If your whole friend group hates your partner, is that a warning sign or peer pressure?

Nicole [00:50:08]: If your whole friend group hates the person.

John [00:50:10]: Yeah. Hates your partner, is that a warning sign or peer Pressure. See, this is where.

Nicole [00:50:14]: See, they might hate your partner because you talk so much crap about your

John [00:50:17]: partner or because they're jealous or because your partner likes Pokemon.

Nicole [00:50:22]: Says the whole group. The whole group's not gonna be jealous.

John [00:50:24]: Yeah. Okay. Or your partner is obnoxious, hates Pokemon. Yeah. Or whatever. Likes Pokemon or whatever. And they're like, this guy's a geek or whatever. But you like that. So you know what I'm saying? It's like, okay, if your whole. I'll just rephrase this.

Nicole [00:50:39]: Yeah, but you should.

John [00:50:40]: If your whole friend group hates anchovies on pizza and you like anchovies on pizza, is that a warning sign or is that. You see what I'm saying? It's like. Yeah, so that's what I'm saying is like, it's irrelevant.

Nicole [00:50:50]: Unless they're like, he is coming home at 3am every night. What are you doing, girl? Like, you need to talk to him.

John [00:50:56]: Yeah, that's more fact type of situation. But is venting about your partner to your friends a form of betrayal? Yes. 100%.

Nicole [00:51:05]: It doesn't. I mean, like, look, you can talk about things you're going through if you want, but again, it's a slippery slope. Cause really, you should be talking to your partner about the things. But if you bad mouth your partner to your friends, they're gonna get bad.

John [00:51:21]: A bad taste, and it's betrayal.

Nicole [00:51:24]: Right.

John [00:51:24]: Right. Yeah. Do jealous friends sabotage relationships because they don't want to lose access to you? Jealousy that way?

Nicole [00:51:35]: I mean, I think that, like, your friends, if you're in a good relationship, they're happy for you.

John [00:51:41]: Yeah. But it's sometimes hard to know. Sometimes it's a subconscious motive. Should your partner's opinion matter more than your best friend's?

Nicole [00:51:53]: Should your partner's opinion matter more than your best friend's? I mean, like, they're the person you're starting your life with.

John [00:52:00]: Once you trash your partner to your friends, can they ever see them fairly again? No.

Nicole [00:52:06]: Yeah, it's very hard. They're not connected to your partner the same way. They can't just, like, go back to having an unbiased opinion.

John [00:52:14]: Yeah. Are people outsourcing courage when they say, everyone thinks I should leave you? Yes.

Nicole [00:52:20]: Wait, what?

John [00:52:21]: Are people outsourcing courage when they say, everyone thinks I should leave you?

Nicole [00:52:28]: Yeah.

John [00:52:28]: Yeah.

Nicole [00:52:30]: I think they're also just trying to not have the decision be put all on them by being like, see, everybody told me to leave you.

John [00:52:37]: And then also, like, one of the points is, like, a dangerous friend always validates. You.

Nicole [00:52:43]: I don't like those type of friends. Yeah, some people want those type of friends. Yeah. If your friend can't be like, hey, what are you doing? Or, like, disagree with you, that's not really a good friend. If you only want someone that just agrees with you, go get AI Companion. If that's what you want. It should just be validated.

John [00:52:59]: Every time you vent.

Nicole [00:53:00]: Or a therapist.

John [00:53:01]: Every time you vent, you're prosecuting your partner in a court they know, they don't know exists.

Nicole [00:53:06]: Every time you what?

John [00:53:07]: Vent, you're prosecuting your partner in a court they don't know exists.

Nicole [00:53:11]: Oh, that's a good quote.

John [00:53:13]: That's a good one. Yeah, but.

Nicole [00:53:15]: Well, I think we hashed it out.

John [00:53:19]: Yeah, I think so. I think that's. It's. It's.

Nicole [00:53:25]: Yeah, it is a slippery slope.

John [00:53:27]: Yeah. My advice is don't tell people I know about your business. Keep your business to yourself.

Nicole [00:53:34]: I think you should be able to talk, but you have to know the implications. And you have to have your own opinion. And you have to follow your heart, not anyone else's. It's your life.

John [00:53:44]: All right. Anything else you got? No, that's it. All right, let's wrap it up then. Next.

Nicole [00:53:56]: That's why I'm turned this way.

John [00:53:58]: If you have a question for us, you can email us@betterthanperfectpodcastmail.com and if you want to check out the website, betterthanperfectpod.com Leave us a review.

Nicole [00:54:09]: 5 stars.

John [00:54:10]: Ask your friends. Ask your friends about the podcast. See what they say. We'll see you next time.

Nicole [00:54:16]: Bye.